Long-distance parenting presents unique challenges, particularly when it comes to staying connected with your kids. Weekly calls can feel like a lifeline, but without the right preparation and mindset, they may fall short of fostering a strong bond. In this guide, we’ll explore best practices for making your weekly calls engaging, meaningful, and emotionally fulfilling for both you and your children.
Step 1: Prepare Before the Call
The foundation of a good call is preparation. Don’t wait until the call starts to think about what you want to talk about. Instead, take a few minutes beforehand to reflect on what’s going on in your child’s life.
Best Practice: Keep a notebook or digital journal of key events in your child’s life, such as school activities, new friends, or recent hobbies. Reference these during your call to show your child you’re paying attention and care about what’s important to them.
Psychological Insight: According to child psychologists, consistency and attentiveness from a parent—even over a distance—can significantly strengthen a child’s sense of security and emotional connection.
Step 2: Ask Open-Ended, Engaging Questions
One of the most common mistakes parents make during calls is asking close-ended questions like, "How was your day?" or "Did you finish your homework?" These questions often lead to brief, one-word answers that cut off conversation. Instead, ask open-ended questions that encourage your child to share more.
- "What’s the coolest thing that happened this week?"
- "What are you most excited about right now?"
- "If you could have any superpower, what would it be and why?"
Best Practice: Frame your questions in a way that invites your child to reflect and express themselves fully. This makes the conversation richer and more interactive.
Step 3: Incorporate Fun and Play
Children, especially younger ones, may struggle to sit still for long conversations. Make the calls fun by incorporating activities and games. You can play a simple guessing game, share riddles, or ask them to show you their drawings or toys over video chat.
Best Practice: Create a weekly tradition, like a fun game or activity you do together each time. For example, you could have "Riddle of the Week" or ask your child to teach you something new they’ve learned.
Psychological Insight: Child development experts emphasize the importance of play in building parent-child bonds. Games can help reduce anxiety and create positive memories associated with the calls.
Step 4: Focus on Emotional Connection
Divorce can create emotional distance, but regular calls are a chance to bridge that gap. Ask your children how they feel—not just about the divorce, but about their everyday life. Validate their emotions and let them know it’s okay to feel whatever they’re feeling.
Best Practice: Be present, patient, and empathetic. If your child seems upset, listen without judgment and offer reassurance, not solutions.
Takeaway: Calls as a Tool for Building Emotional Connection
Weekly calls with your children during a long-distance divorce don’t have to be formal or overly serious. By preparing thoughtful questions, incorporating play, and focusing on emotional connection, you can turn each call into a meaningful experience that strengthens your bond, no matter the distance.
At the heart of long-distance parenting is the opportunity to create meaningful connections, no matter the miles in between. By preparing, staying engaged, and embracing the emotional side of these weekly calls, you can continue to nurture the bond with your children. If you have any questions about parenting during divorce or need further legal support, feel free to reach out. I'm here to help guide you through every step.
Contact:
Michele McGill
Family Law & Civil Litigation
615-389-6453